Runner's Blues

This is where I want to be!

But for now, I'm limping around the house in my old running shoes with a sore heel, a sore neck, and a sometimes pain in my hip.

What the hell happened?

Well, the first thing that happened was I started running minimalist. Three years ago I got my first pair, a pair of Merrells that were amazing! I have always worn flats, flip flops, and I have super strong feet...
Then I got my first pair of Vibrams. The first run I went on wearing them, I literally ran the fastest I had ever run! I love these shoes! But, like anything you love, I overindulged. I ran many, many kilometres with them and I ran down the heel... and hurt my bod.

And, all you social justice warriors out there, you say, why do we care about what shoes you run in? Granted. I remember how guilty I used to feel while the South Africans were fighting for justice and I was going to university, drinking, and having a good old time. It tore me apart. I remembered when I was in Africa and someone brought me her baby, the little one was dying. There was nothing I could do... 

But when I look at the running movement around the world - man, we are just out there running, in shoes, without shoes: men, women, girls, boys, wombin, people that identify as whatever they damn well please so long as it includes "runner" somewhere in the title. Titles mean so much to us though, don't they? I don't call myself a midwife, or do I? Do I do midwife stuff? Is it a duck or a zebra?
A duck LOOKS like a duck. A Zebra LOOKS like a zebra. A runner LOOKS like anyone. 

So, I was supposed to be running a half marathon on Sunday but I can't do it because I don't want to hurt myself any more. So I'm just doing a ten k and really looking forward to the challenge! 
I ran the other day in my new shoes, Sayonara Wave, it was great! No pain, just a little tired after five k, a little out of shape. I spent my run trying to empty my mind, had a sore neck as well from tension, because of some awful witch hunt thingy I heard about, also worrying about the inaccessibility of decent midwifery care and midwifery education for people who can't afford it.

But I ran anyway. Then I ran yesterday, lovely to be back out there, I ran through a leafy suburb behind our house, trying to keep my pace under six but I didn't, I kept it under 6 and a half though.
The thing about running is, you're competing against yourself, even if you're in a race, you just want to run faster and better than you've ever run before. You empty your mind: you don't worry about your kids, or why you ever left the farm, or how the people in the birth community are treating each other so badly, or why the good people die young. You just run.

It's kind of like life that way. You just keep doing it, and trying to do it better and better and better and better, and it feels so good to keep on keeping on!
So, wish me luck! And wish y'all luck and - hey, give it a try! You might like it!


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